Saturday, January 28, 2006

Orange Alert

Orange Alert: Go Shopping
Red Alert: Shop only online

Jesus Loves you

Go shopping

Saturday, January 07, 2006

Turdo & Zoretenz (from 100 Years of Attitude)

Turdo – Do you really have something to say?

Zoretenz – My ass. It is hurting, my ass

Turdo– Why is that?

Zoretenz– I have a big piece of shit that doesn’t want to come out

Turdo – Oh, no. It’s so big! I can see it!

Zoretenz – Can you help me to get it out?

Turdo – Look what a big piece of shit he has there!

– Oh, awful!

Zoretenz – Can you help me to get it out?

Turdo – How did you get such a big piece of shit in there? Were you eating a lot?

Zoretenz– Oh, please, get it out! Get it out!

Turdo– I don’t think we can get that thing out. I think it’s stuck in there for ever

Zoretenz– Oh, no! Will I have to live forever with this big piece of shit inside me?

Turdo – Yes, I think so

Zoretenz – Oh, no!

Turdo – It’s your soul

Zoretenz – What? That is the soul? I have a soul?

Turdo – Yes, you have a soul and it is stuck in there. It is not going anywhere

Zoretenz – Are you sure this is not some kind of turd that is supposed to get out through a natural digestive tube or something, like the anus?

Turdo– No, I told you. It’s stuck in there. It’s too big

Zoretenz – Oh, I have a big soul

Turdo– A very big soul

– It stinks. Get it out already!

Zoretenz– Alright, alright. I’ll put on my pants.

Como escribis?

- De donde viene lo que escribis? Como te inspiras?
- Me lo dictan
- Eso es esquizofrenia
- Ezquizofrenia?
- Si
- Es malo?
- Es muy malo
- Porque?
- Porque significa que no estas bien
- Yo estoy bien
- No, no estas bien
- Si, estoy bien
- Estas segura que tenes esquizofrenia?
- No, vos me dijiste
- Claro, porque escuchas voces
- Eso es esquizofrenia?
- Si, psicosis
- Vos no escuchas voces?
- No
- Nunca?
- Bueno si, si alguien me habla, o si estoy escuchando la tele o la radio
- Yo tambien
- Bueno, pero vos tambien escuchas voces de nadie, voces que no se sabe de donde vienen
- Que importa de donde vienen?
- Claro que importa, si no vienen de nadie o nada real es una falla mental
- Pero sabes que bien escribo?
- Y en que idioma te dictan?
- Depende, a veces en ingles, a veces en castellano
- O sea que son varias personas
- O no
- Es verdad, o no. Bueno igual vos no sentis dolor o depression ni nada, no?
- No, yo te dije que estoy bien